Just Another Day

The other night, I had an interesting chat with an old friend with whom I used to chat with online.  We haven't talked online in quite a while.  Years and years ago, I was part of a chat group and gave it up.  But I stayed in touch with a core group of friends, with whom I'm still friends with ten years later.   What I like about these types of friendships is that when we haven't talked in ages, we can pick up where we left off, even when we haven't seen each other in awhile.

I told him I wasn't sure what to do, Brittany wants to become a Lutheran and I don't know anything about the Lutheran religion.  I don't go to church and I don't know very much about any religion in particular.  My hub's mom took her kids to a Lutheran Church every Sunday while he was growing up,  but he doesn't go any longer. He was a kid when he attended, couldn't tell me a thing about the doctrines of their faith anymore than he can tell me what's on the top shelf in our refrigerator.   My own family didn't go to church when I was a kid, so  I'm not real sure what denomination I'm supposed to be.  I got married in a Presbyterian church because my friends went there. It seemed like the right thing to do at the time.  The things you do when you're 22.

Anyway, my online friend was exactly the right person to talk to about this, having majored in religious studies for several years. He was also a former lay minister for a church in South Carolina.  He has changed careers and is now in the medical field.  In the past, whenever I've had a religious question or dilemma, I've turned to him for help.  In addition to straight answers and honest perspectives, the man has a sense of humor that rivals anything I've come across.  So I hit him up with my Lutheran ignorance.

They used terms, I told him, that I didn't understand, such as catechism and others that I can't remember as I type this.   I had no idea what the difference was between the Lutheran church and any other church.  I guess he picked up on my ignorance yet again, because after he got done laughing, I was able to get some serious comments out of him.  I told him that Britt has been close friends with a group of girls since kindergarten, and three of them are members of a Lutheran church near us.  She has been attending the Sunday school with these girls off and on for a few years now.  They have a real active youth group and she wants to join it.  I didn't have any problem with that, but the parents are active in the group, and I'll have to join the church for her confirmation.  I've always volunteered in school and extra curricular activities, and I've always chaperoned every field trip the girls went on for school, but you can't just do that with a church that you're not a member of.  I didn't know what was involved in confirmation and more importantly, I didn't know a thing about Lutherans!

Now, there are people in this world who still don't understand the internet at all. I have friends who have no idea how to navigate the internet and for whom email is still a novelty. These are the types of people who like to rant about the evil that is on the internet, the porn, the scams, the terrible things that happen in chat rooms, the marriages that dissolve because of it.   I know these things happen, I've seen it with my own eyes, but I believe there is more good online then bad. You choose what you want to get involved with.   

Look at it this way, your town probably has bars and strip joints  and hookers on the street corner.  It's there, but that doesn't mean you have to join them.   I choose not to get involved in that stuff.  If I hadn't bothered to make the friends I have online, I never would have found such a good friend in this guy!  I have friends offline who question the men who comment on my blog.  One of them, having observed my friend Nil's comments, has asked about him repeatedly.  I wonder why they're so obsessed that I would have online friends with a guys while I'm married.  Should I only stick to females?   This isn't the 1940's, last I checked.   And more importantly, it's not a problem for Rick and I.   I invite them to get out the dictionary and look up the word "platonic" and if they still don't believe the definition, they can shove it.   Frankly, I have very little patience for small minds.

I have still not decided if I'm going to join this church, but my friend did give me a brief history of Martin Luther, why he nailed his Ninety-Five Theses to the door of the Wittenberg Church, and what the doctrine of their religion is all about.   Mostly we talked about how it differs from the Catholic church.  We also talked about everything on earth from all the pot smoking that goes on in Costa Rica to what happened to his dad in the aftermath after Ivan wiped over Pensacola.   
Britt is currently at the Sunday school as I type this, attending the 7th grade class that she enjoys so much.  I've decided to join her at 11 am for services and see what it's like.  And when I'm there, I'll thank God for friends I've made, both online, and off.   

Comments

[Mike]

I'm glad you have this trusted friend for obvious reasons. And I'm glad both for you and Britt. RE: small minds, their judgments say more about them than those they judge. RE: Denominations, what matters is ones own personal relationship with God. I believe the most important thing a parent will pass on to their children is living their faith. Human failures in behavior are not God's failures - some confuse that issue.

[Old Horsetail Snake]

The platonic Mr. Snake here. It seems odd to me that you would have to join the church for your daughter to participate. In fact, it doesn't seem right. But, heck, it's your nickel. I know you'd do anything for your kid.

[FTS]

I'll second your comments on good online friends. Good people, like cream, will always float to the top.

Thank you, by the way, for being one of my good blog buddies. Or buddettes. ;-)

[poopie]

I'm with you on the small minds...no patience at all with that. Hope you enjoy the service and come away with some answers!

[Nils]

Platonic, huh? Damn. And here I had such high hopes ...

My wife and kids know you as "Florida Laura", and hear about your escapades all the time. They had a wonderful merry laugh about the feeding station you set up for our herons, they know about Buddy and Rico and they give me updates as yet another hurricane bears down on you and your family.

I am pleased to be stimulating gossip and speculation, though. At my age, it's nice to be stimulating anything.

As for Lutherans, my Dad used to say "Lutheranism is like Catholicism with all the fun parts taken out." Dad was United Church, not that the pastor would have recognized him.

[MrsDoF]

The church congregation I attend is not the same denomination as the one I was raised in. I went to the history and membership classes and learned quite a bit.
The reason I go to the one I do is because I am comfortable with the people there, how much friendship is encouraged; not how much, or little, Bible thumping happens.
If your daughter is attending for the youth group, and you meet the leaders and your instincts say things could work out, I say let her go for it.
I find it a bit odd that the parents have to join for the child to participate though. Our minister's wife is an employee in the office of another church in town, not even our denomination, and we find the overlap educates and supports all concerned.

And about online friends of both sexes, you are oh so right about it. It's very nice to get differenct perspectives.

[mom]

I think you are doing the right thing allowing Brittany to attend the church she likes and going to a service yourself. Good for you.
I don't think it matters which church you go to as long as you are comfortable there. Members of your father's family are Lutherans.

As for your friendship with Nils, I find it hard to understand anyone would find that weird or wrong. I have read a lot of his writings and find him very amusing and very perceptive. I would also welcome him as a friend. I do not understand why people are so judgemental and narrow minded. This world would be much better off if people would stop sticking their noses where it does not belong.

[Laura]

Update: There were lightning bolts ALL around us when we walked out of the church. I kid you NOT! Britt grabbed me when one of them hit the parking lot and freaked both of us out. I couldn't get over the irony and was laughing inside. A friend of mine used to tell me that if I ever went to church, there would be lighting bolts for sure. I wish she was still here. ahhhhh. oh Lord..

I had a real good time. It wasn't what I thought it would be. It was rather casual, lots of families, babies with bottles, twenty somethings. All ages, really.

They had a small band in there playing. I recognized one of the teenagers on the drums. The pastor was funny, had the congregation laughing quite a few times during the sermon.
They sing often in this church, throughout the service. And everytime they started up with a new song, I'd hear a voice beside me popping up to sing. I don't know if I've ever told you, but Britt just loves to sing. She was right at home.

Thank you all for your support and encouraging words following this post. It was a little new for me to do this sort of thing.

[Angie]

I am glad you had a positive experience at church. Religion and church and church families are a very personal thing, matters of the heart and mind and spirit individual to us all. Pray for discernment and where you need to be. You will get an answer.

With no conflict between you and your husband about your online friends perhaps this post will help those who do not understand to let it go.

[Ruth]

"I invite them to get out the dictionary and look up the word "platonic" and if they still don't believe the definition, they can shove it. Frankly, I have very little patience for small minds."

Well said! Some peeps have a real problem with this - I don't know what century they're living in.

[steelcowboy]

Sounds like you've got a great friend there. It is so nice to have those we can turn to, whether it be on-line, or off.
It's good that you are going to see for yourself what the services are like. Hard to judge by only one however, just a word to the wise.
As Mike stated, denominations are made up of people, who make mistakes and can err; the Church - is Christ centered. It is up to each of us individually to decide what we are and are not comfortable with; it's between us and our Lord.
Good luck, God bless, God speed.

[meritt]

I saw your update and smiled. Good. I'm glad you liked it! I am also amazed and happy you took your daughter. That is so awesome. I just wonder how many people listen to their kids and take them seriously when they say they want to attend a church! LOL. To go schleping off to service with them... awesome. Kudos Mom!

Too funny about the lightening bolts though! You'll have to go again and see if it happens twice! Now THAT would be interesting.

PS:
I'm not Lutheran, but I worked as the Administrative Assistant for 2 different Lutheran Churches for about 7 years.

[Jeff]

Great points about the online community. I have friends from a decade ago online I still consider close friends - even though we've never met.